anti-prose. random matter.
what's it all about
Published on May 16, 2005 By crimson In Blogging
It's not the first time I've recognized this about myself.

I'm pretty good at avoiding topics that I simply do not want to discuss.

When I'm on smoke break at work, the last thing that I generally want to talk about is work. I mean, shite, I've only got 15 minutes to get away from it all... I just flat-out don't want to hear about someone else's bad day. It's a 50-50 draw that I'm having one, too.

And if I'm relaxing at my pub, having a pint, the last thing that I want to hear about is someone else's politics. I don't care if you're for the death penalty, against taxes, or support gay marriage. I might be, too, but, when I'm enjoying some oldie tunes, and a cool, bitter ale, the first thing to wreck my mood is to rant on about a system that I'm entirely skeptical towards.

And if I'm with family members, the last thing that I want to 'share' is my feelings about the arguement that we've had time to 'step back' from. For me, it's over. You might be pretending to be polite, but I know that you're still pissed. If you bring it up, I know you've finally prepared your retalliation. But you're fighting a one-man war, buddy. I'm beyond it now, and if you're not, I don't care. Simple as that.

See, the more that I work at a job where I'm forced to carry conversations with people I don't know, don't care, and generally don't even like, the more I realize how much more often I'm inclined to step back from conversations with people that I do have some feelings towards. I really would rather not get into a shouting match, and I'd rather walk away from a confrontation, not because I can't stand up for myself, but because I just cannot be bothered. I'd rather spend what time I have away from work, doing things that I want to do, and not doing things that I hate. That includes feigning interests in political debates. And bringing up the past repeatedly.

And I find that if I feel that I'm cornered, I will, more often than not, just simply stand up and walk away.

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