In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey...
-Beck
The end of my weekend, a lazy Sunday (but really Tuesday) morning sans coffee. I'm dying for a coffee, by the way.
I went to the movies for a record-breaking 2 days in a row, and am seriously considering a third trip. I took Kolio to see Pirates, which was both gross and dreamy, says the child in me. I then saw the Devil Wears Prada with my twin, and it was most excellent. Now everyone may rave about Meryl Streep, but hands down, Emily Blunt (who?) was the ultimate amongst a cast of betterknowns. I'd love to see Superman, which was my first choice to see, but everyone else had dibs first.
I'm listening to Little Wing by Derek and the Dominos, and am anxiously awaiting the time to pick Kole up from summer school. Poor girlie doesn't want to be there, and to be honest, I seriously can't see that it's helping at all. We've been doing our own reading together, and it's like nothing is working, nothing is happening. She has, at most, 30 sight words. The rest of it is forgettable from one day to the next. And I really don't know how to fix this, how to make it better for her. Because I can't. Is it getting her down? Not much, but it's really taking me out for a spin.
I stayed up as late as I could last night, drinking beer and smoking cheap cigarettes. Of course, because I'm on six am shifts and I don't want to mess things up too much for the rest of the week, I only had 2 Buds and was in bed by 11. Sad, sad, sad. But not really. I'm a social bear, but I haven't felt up for anything, lately. I've been playing endless rounds of Freecell on my ancient computer, and have idly scribbled a bit here and there. But I've been pretty unproductive. I don't want to do anything after work these days, and I'm too tired to even like writing or make plans to hit the nearest internet hookup. Kole and I have just been spending a lot of time together, taking strolls arm in arm, doubling on the bike, and doing inhouse art projects. The bonus of having a child is getting to play with glue, beads, and tape all over again. I feel so young but...
The aging process has really begun. I've noticed strands of grey in my hair since the late 90s, but it's coming in loud and clear now. And when I wake up in the morning my frown line is more pronounced and there's a horror slash mark across the side of one cheek. It's obvious I like to sleep on a particular side, but I don't like it announced to the whole world. And where did this creaky knee come from anyway? I've never had knee issues before, but now, my left knee makes loud noises, especially when I squat down to pick up another Barbie doll, or look for a missing shoe. I've got crinks in my neck, and my shoulder aches in the rain. Is this what it's like to get old? I've never been that aware of my body, and now I am... for all the wrong reasons.
To counteract this evildoing, I've been biking, swimming and I even went for a jog the other day. The jog burned my lungs, and I felt like I was going to pass out on the side of the green trail. Immediately after exercizing I went home, plugged in the air con, lit up a smoke and sprawled out on the couch for the next 2 hours. Bad habits die hard, they say.
I've been reading a lot, too. I went to a bookstore and picked up 5 books for three dollars. Clive Cussler, Larry McMurtry, Farley Mowat, Jeffery Deaver and a Sam Shepard. Just a coupla old American boys with a Canadian thrown in for good measure. Most of the books are finished, and I'm planning on going back to get another handful or two. There's nothing I like better than going downtown with a paperback in my back pocket, the other pocket filled with a fistful of change. Coffee and the written word enjoyed in a quiet cafe, or in the great outdoors. Little pieces of heaven, for sure.
I sat by the river the other day, and the sun sparkled on the water. I saw some ducks and a lone rabbit. I smelled the deep brown earth as the clouds grew overhead. The humidity of the day vanished in mere seconds and suddenly it was cool and fresh and gusty. Everything smelled so alive, and the clouds rumbled in agreement. I made it home when the first raindrops fell from above. I stood outside as it thundered and clapped. I was soaked to the skin before I went inside.