anti-prose. random matter.
for the time being...
Published on April 5, 2004 By crimson In Blogging
It's no big surprise that I've been crushing on someone. I've mentioned it in passing, but really, held no hope that anything would come of it. I've had my time of whirlwind romances, or so I thought.

The man that I've been falling for is so not my normal pursuit.

I used to go for the bad guys... the arrogant, the cocky, the hard-to-pin-down.

And then, somewhere between dreams and reality, I chose someone who was not my norm. He irons his own shirts. He seemed responsible with his money, and his friendships. There is not one bad thing that I could say about him, except... that he's not mine.

I'm a shy girl. When it comes to revealing anything important that I feel in my life, that is. I don't just tell all to those around me. I take my time to get to know people, and in time, will let those I trust, into my own world of just plain living. Maybe because I've never been one of those people who open up to just anyone, I feel that those I want to trust, must first expect some trust in me.

He doesn't love me. I don't think I loved him, really. A crush is when you feel something for someone you don't really know. But it still hurts when you realize he doesn't feel the same for you. The same anticipation of what might be, of what is yet to come.

We are good friends. We are starting to plan our weeks together. But, I don't think it's going to happen for us. That love that can encapsulate the past, and overcome old wounds. Maybe I expected too much. Maybe I am just a romantic, though I try hard not to be. We will be friends, but I doubt there will be much more.

I don't know if I should stay sad or just feel grateful to at least have one more good friend.

Comments
on Apr 05, 2004
i'm not telling you anything you don't know here, but I feel that it's worth mentioning this. Sometimes the best of all relationships start out as friendships... you just never know what's coming. Have you heard Reba McEntire's new song yet? give it a listen, or better yet, try n catch the video. It's good stuff and it kinda mentions what you're talking about here... no matter what happens, good luck to ya...

Some relationships start out with that animal attraction and lust that just has you wanting to 'do' each other from day one. Those are usually the ones where you end up sleeping together too soon, and the flame usually burns out. If you're 'just friends' to start out with, it's more like a slow burning flickering flame. after a few months together, all it takes is a little oxygen or a little fuel to get the flame burning out of control... if you know what I mean... those are the ones that usually end up burning for a really long time...
on Apr 05, 2004
I absolutely agree with MJ, it's much easier to turn a good friendship into a relationship, cause it takes lots of love to be best friends to begin with. Both of my realtionships started out as friendships, before something clicked and passion seemed to have come out of nowhere. Good luck with it. Even if it doesn't work out, as you've said, at least you'll have a good friend, that's worth something, isn't it?
on Apr 05, 2004
You are absolutely the best. I hate asking, or receiving advise, but this was just so needed right now. He is a good man: one of the few people that I have been attracted to, to be able to call him a man, and not just a guy... There's nothing wrong right now, it's just not going the way that I am used to having things go for me... if you know what I mean. We are, and are going to be better friends, but I am just ready to give up on having a crush on him now... I'd rather wait and see how things turn out, than plan for something that cannot be planned. Not giving up, but not wishing for something out of the blue.

I might have mentioned it elsewhere, but I've missed you!
on Apr 05, 2004
Mack, I am so surprised to see you around Joeuser, the same time that I am. Mind you, it's 4:30 in the AM where I am at right now, but I still don't know what time it is where you are. Either way, thanks for the words. He and I are good friends right now, but I was really crushing on him for quite some time. I'm actually kind of glad that things are going the way that they are... but, I'm pretty much an instant gratification kind of girl. I don't want to cut him, because I get the feeling that he's not ready for something just yet, but at the same time, we are starting to spend some time together, and plan for the days ahead. That's much better, really. It's gotten to the point where I can be satisfied with just friendship. As if frienship can be narrowed down to a just option. I am really pretty lucky, actually.
on Apr 05, 2004
Both of my realtionships started out as friendships


I don't know if the 'real' in realtionships was intentional or not, but I Like it!
on Apr 05, 2004
It's weird when the shoe is on the other foot...

If i can let you in on a guys perspective... well, mine at least... and last time i checked, everything was in order... Guys dont stick around girls they dont care about... that is the honest to God truth.

Maybe test the waters... this is probably wrong, but i would suggest taking him out for a night on the turps.. get him smashed and dont make advances per se, but flirt like crazy...

Alcohol isn't irresponsibility, it can be an expression if ones sub-conscious in an other wise harsh world! You just have to go into something like that emotionally stable...

I know the right thing will happen either way!

BAM!!!
on Apr 05, 2004
It's Monday, 6:42pm, +14 hours if I'm not mistaken (I started timestamping my blogs for that precise reason, lol)
on Apr 05, 2004
Wow, you sound exactly like I used to sound as far as the type of guys you were attracted to. I was the same way and if I was in a relationship it never lasted more than a year and a half. Well, I am here to tell you that I finally met the "nice" my best friend and we have been married 6 years this October. It is strange when you are out of your comfort zone but way worth the effort! Good luck to you no matter what happens.
on Apr 05, 2004
Nicky, Nice guys go slow. They don't want to be hurt and they don't want to hurt you--what a concept? When you are doing what you are doing in your life, you attract a different type of person. So just be friends and things will probably change. After all friendship is priceless.
on Apr 06, 2004
I have had no replies on the liver thing yet so you might not be in luck, sorry. Let you know if one comes around.
on Apr 06, 2004
I have had no replies on the liver thing yet so you might not be in luck, sorry. Let you know if one comes around.